The other day a client remarked that they left work depressed every weekday and thought about work more than they cared to admit. 

We've all had jobs that leave us ranting and raving well into our non-work time or ruminating over difficult conversations, mistakes or what might have been. 

Even jobs and businesses we love can take over our time off!

Some people argue that it's okay to think about work all the time if you love it, but I believe that no matter the quality of your working life, you need to switch off and live a life outside of work. 

Happily, I'm supported by a range of research on that!

So how do we go about kicking work out of our heads and making the most of our time off?

There's no denying that when you feel foxy and sparky on the outside you also get an internal boost.

It feels awesome when your outside represents your glorious inside. 

The thing is that dressing for work can be so soul sucking. So many spoken and unspoken rules hemming in (boom boom) us all. 

So what is the secret to feeling awesome in what you adorn yourself with each day?

This week something inside me snapped. I woke up inside when I heard Ched Myers talk about 'how domesticated' we had all become.

I interpreted it his comment as saying we had become so passive, submissive and docile socially and politically.

How we had started to prefer thinking hopeful thoughts over acting to promote hope-filled action and outcomes.

We are thinking and acting like children, rather than adults. 

The other day a friend sent me a text saying 'I'm fine, I just hate my work SO much'.

Oy. If only work was three hours a week and not 40 (plus).

If we are honest, work gets the best of us for around three to five days a week. 

When we love our work, it's challenging, meaningful, inspiring and fun, spending time at work is life giving.

But what do you do when you hate your work?

The 'bad' habits that I struggle with now have been in my life for much of my life.

When I was growing up and upset, I remember industriously (and sneakily) making my own icing and eating it in my room... you'll never guess what my go to is now when I'm upset, will you?

Turning to sweets when I am upset is a bad habit for me. Sweets, of course, are gorgeous and wonderful in moderation, but not as a way to avoid feeling emotions that are difficult.

There is no point beating myself up about this habit though, in fact, the only time it shifts is when I see it for what it is - an outdated way of looking after myself.

Which brings me to my point -

Your bad habits are all there for a reason and that reason is love.

I can go from optimistic and sunny to anxious and distracted when one thing is reduced in my day - sleep.

Sleep is truly the one thing that makes everything better, easier, clearer, yet we sacrifice it for other parts of our lives over and over. It's proven to make us more successful, efficient and happier.

A piece of research I conducted at ANU showed that people cut down sleep to the minimum required to function (not thrive) and routinely 'trade' sleep for time to themselves and to relax at night. 

The thing is, it's an ongoing cycle. 

The less sleep you get, the more time you need to wind down and relax - the more 'me' time you need because you are zoned out, unfocused, flat and fatigued.

So what is stopping you from sleeping enough, not to survive, but to really thrive?

I once worked at a lovely place doing work that I couldn't stand. The monotony of it, the way it went against what I'd been taught was best practice, the challenges with working with my boss. Oy.

You can imagine how I came home each day. Sure I was bloody glad to be out the door, but I had a work hangover every night and no energy the next morning.

Let's face facts - no one leaves work at work. No one. So what can we do about it?

One of my favourite things to ask people is, "If you had a million dollars, what would you do?".

What would you say "yes" to with wild enthusiasm?

What work would you do?

Where would you holiday?

Who would you spend time with?

What hobby or business would you pursue?

In short, how would your life change?

The other morning I saw these words scraped into concrete "F*ck you Tony Abbott".

Tony Abbott is a former Prime Minister of Australia and one who was the face of political decision making that people either loved or really loathed. You can guess what this particular artist thought about him.

What stuck out for me was the relative pointlessness of targeting one person. Old Tony is on the sidelines now.

So should leaders be targeted or is there another way to actively make the world fairer and better? 

What can you even do? SO much and it will feel so damn good. 

Do you beat yourself up to keep yourself in line, to achieve, to excel, to just keep going?

You might call it 'high standards' (*ahem*), but it has a nasty undertone. It looks like picking at yourself, saying and doing things that you would never do or say to someone else. 

I bet it's worked for you for a long time.

It's probably been at your side for some huge successes!

It works (to a point) but it will never get you where you want to go in one piece. 

Real motivation comes from a different place that we are rarely taught about.